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Post by oxenboy on Feb 15, 2010 20:01:16 GMT
timely warning after Valentine's day perhaps Agree with you,I'm only 5' 8", a tall bird wouldn't be my first choice ;D
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Post by Deleted on Feb 15, 2010 22:29:43 GMT
Last night, my kids and I were sitting in the living room and I said to them, 'I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.'
They got up, unplugged the Computer, and threw out my wine.
They’re such a$$h0les ...
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Post by Deleted on Feb 17, 2010 19:23:39 GMT
Hi
I am trying to make some extra money on the side, so I have decided to make bookshelves. It is nothing special, but they do look great, anywhere in the house.
Please let me know if you are interested.
Once you have given me the amount of shelves you would like I can give you a price. Great idea for Birthday pressies!!!
I have attached a photo for you, to get an idea of what I am up to!!! Please take a look as I am very proud of my work.
Look forward to your support and if anyone has any used materials that they would like to get rid of, feel free to pass them on!
CheersAttachments:
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Post by mcfarmer on Feb 17, 2010 19:39:08 GMT
Hi
I am trying to make some extra money on the side, so I have decided to make bookshelves. It is nothing special, but they do look great, anywhere in the house.
Please let me know if you are interested.
Once you have given me the amount of shelves you would like I can give you a price. Great idea for Birthday pressies!!!
I have attached a photo for you, to get an idea of what I am up to!!! Please take a look as I am very proud of my work.
Look forward to your support and if anyone has any used materials that they would like to get rid of, feel free to pass them on!
Cheers Oh, great, so much for checking this forum at work.
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Post by stockslave on Feb 17, 2010 19:44:56 GMT
Hi
I am trying to make some extra money on the side, so I have decided to make bookshelves. It is nothing special, but they do look great, anywhere in the house.
Please let me know if you are interested.
Once you have given me the amount of shelves you would like I can give you a price. Great idea for Birthday pressies!!!
I have attached a photo for you, to get an idea of what I am up to!!! Please take a look as I am very proud of my work.
Look forward to your support and if anyone has any used materials that they would like to get rid of, feel free to pass them on!
Cheers Oh, great, so much for checking this forum at work. Sorry McFarmer, it's totally my fault . I sent Joyce the above to give her a laugh and cheer her up a bit. She thought it was meant for the forum and in her defence did email and question it, but I didn't pick up the email as quickly as I should have.
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Post by oxenboy on Feb 17, 2010 20:16:59 GMT
never mind, at least they were held up with sellotape
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Post by quadbod on Feb 24, 2010 20:45:11 GMT
Rooney told Colleen that John Terry had shagged every England players wife apart from one..............
Colleen said " I bets its posh spice the stuck up cow" !!
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Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2010 22:23:34 GMT
haha talk about foot in mouth ;D
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Post by stockslave on Feb 25, 2010 9:39:24 GMT
A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. It went in one ear and out the udder.
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Post by grawley on Feb 26, 2010 21:53:55 GMT
LAUGH A LITTLE EVERY DAY....
There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here right now thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
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Post by grawley on Feb 26, 2010 22:01:25 GMT
Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket Scientist!!??
Scientists at Rolls Royce built a gun specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners and military jets all travelling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields. American engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high speed trains. Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to the American engineers. When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's back-rest in two and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin like an arrow shot from a bow.. The horrified Yanks sent Rolls Royce the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield and begged the British scientists for suggestions
Rolls Royce responded with a one-line memo:
....
....
"Defrost the chicken!
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Post by oxenboy on Feb 27, 2010 9:19:44 GMT
;D ;D ;D
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Post by Deleted on Feb 27, 2010 9:58:11 GMT
When the forces were stationed on St Kilda they had airdrops of food. Someone had their shoulder broken by a falling [frozen] chicken
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Post by Deleted on Mar 2, 2010 23:14:10 GMT
An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years.
He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple, and peach trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over.
He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, 'we're not coming out until you leave!'
The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked.'
Holding the bucket up he said, 'I'm here to feed the alligator...'
Some old men can still think fast.
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Post by oxenboy on Mar 3, 2010 9:27:42 GMT
will remember that one
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