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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2011 19:52:37 GMT
Hi, has anyone ever read a science fiction story about choosing the gender of cattle by which way the cow was looking when she got served? You'll remember the punchline.  I can't remember if it was by Asimov, Clarke or Dick. I have it in a collection but can't seem to find it. If you can remember who it was please help me as it's getting annoying now. If you could help me to find an online version, I'm sure all on here would enjoy it. Many thanks, Neil |
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Post by stockslave on Aug 16, 2011 10:51:06 GMT
Hi Neil, I'm afraid I've never read the book but I have been doing some googling of all three authors. Unfortunately I'm fishing in the dark as I don't know the punchline. If you can give me a bit more to go on, I'll have another search.  |
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Post by stockslave on Aug 16, 2011 11:00:48 GMT
At the moment I'm leaning towards Asimov:
Isaac Asimov
You have two cows. They both obey The Three Laws of Bovinics:
1. A cow may not harm a human being or through inaction allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A cow must obey all orders given it by a human being unless where such orders would conflict with First Law.
3. A cow must protect itself unless where such protection would conflict with the First Law, Second Law, or McDonald's' wishes.
But I could be barking up the wrong tree.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 16, 2011 14:00:57 GMT
I'm coming around to thinking it was in a compilation of stories by different authors.
Young man takes fathers cow to neighbouring large, sucessful dairy farmer's bull. One dairy farmers son directs him to his brother who is with the bull, another brother helps to get the cow into position.
Dairy farmer asks if he wants a heifer or bull calf? Young man after some thought says a heifer, so farmer turns cow to look into the sun, bull performs duty and dairy farmer says there you go, one heifer calf in progress.
Young man leads cow home thinking of the farmer's three sons all working hard on their father's farm.
Dairy farmer says there's no point having daughters on a farm.
factually incorrect but made me laugh!
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Post by wr on Aug 17, 2011 20:06:28 GMT
At the moment I'm leaning towards Asimov: Isaac Asimov You have two cows. They both obey The Three Laws of Bovinics: 1. A cow may not harm a human being or through inaction allow a human being to come to harm. 2. A cow must obey all orders given it by a human being unless where such orders would conflict with First Law. 3. A cow must protect itself unless where such protection would conflict with the First Law, Second Law, or McDonald's' wishes. But I could be barking up the wrong tree. Definately not a Lim then  |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 26, 2011 20:21:27 GMT
Found it, Ah sweet mystery of Life by Roald Dahl. I'm just looking for a downloadable version now....
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Post by Deleted on Aug 26, 2011 20:26:57 GMT
It's on amazon as paper, audio or kindle - how did you find it in the end then?
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