Post by quadbod on Nov 18, 2015 18:15:15 GMT
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.K. Economy by spending
your 'Winter Fuel’ cheque wisely:
* If you spend the money at Asda or Tesco, the money will go to Gibraltar, Ireland & Luxemburg
* If you spend it on Amazon your money will go Lichtenstein
* If you spend it on ebay your money will go to Ireland
* If you spend it on petrol your money will go to the Arabs
* If you purchase a computer it will go to India, Taiwan or China
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Kenya, Spain or Morocco
* If you spend it in your corner “Asian mini-mart” no tax will be paid, it will be used in drug deals and eventually will be conveyed to Pakistan in a large suitcase to fund terrorism.
* If you spend it on “cheap” cigs it will end up in Romania or Bulgaria
* If you give it to Oxfam 20% only will go abroad and 80% will remain in the hands of the administrators, who will spend it on fact finding missions to Cayman Islands, Thailand & Mauritius.
* If you buy a foreign car it will go to Japan,Germany, France, India or Korea.
* If you buy a British car it will go to Japan, Germany or India.
* If you pay off your credit cards or buy shares, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore
Instead, keep the money in the UK by:
1. Spending it at car boot sales
2. Going to night clubs
3. Spending it on call girls
4. Buying cider, beer or scotch
5. Getting yourself a tattoo
6. Visiting a bookie
(These are the only UK businesses still operating in the U.K )
Conclusion:
Go to a night club with a tattooed call girl that you met at a car boot sale
and drink beer day and night !
It’s the patriotic thing to do.
your 'Winter Fuel’ cheque wisely:
* If you spend the money at Asda or Tesco, the money will go to Gibraltar, Ireland & Luxemburg
* If you spend it on Amazon your money will go Lichtenstein
* If you spend it on ebay your money will go to Ireland
* If you spend it on petrol your money will go to the Arabs
* If you purchase a computer it will go to India, Taiwan or China
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Kenya, Spain or Morocco
* If you spend it in your corner “Asian mini-mart” no tax will be paid, it will be used in drug deals and eventually will be conveyed to Pakistan in a large suitcase to fund terrorism.
* If you spend it on “cheap” cigs it will end up in Romania or Bulgaria
* If you give it to Oxfam 20% only will go abroad and 80% will remain in the hands of the administrators, who will spend it on fact finding missions to Cayman Islands, Thailand & Mauritius.
* If you buy a foreign car it will go to Japan,Germany, France, India or Korea.
* If you buy a British car it will go to Japan, Germany or India.
* If you pay off your credit cards or buy shares, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore
Instead, keep the money in the UK by:
1. Spending it at car boot sales
2. Going to night clubs
3. Spending it on call girls
4. Buying cider, beer or scotch
5. Getting yourself a tattoo
6. Visiting a bookie
(These are the only UK businesses still operating in the U.K )
Conclusion:
Go to a night club with a tattooed call girl that you met at a car boot sale
and drink beer day and night !
It’s the patriotic thing to do.
